The Waiting Room

Wow, it has been a long time...I almost forgot I had a blog! Life has been full, to say the least,and I have chosen to keep my words few because truthfully I needed to work through some raw emotions. But I am feeling the wind blowing my wings back open, readying me for some soaring.

Eamon is doing well, in general. We have experienced some increased apnea episodes necessitating the tweaking of ventilator settings and respiratory treatments. He still maintains his breathing (day and night) on room air - an absolute miracle. Eamon is gaining, at his own precious pace, strength in his arms and legs. He is learning to swallow and managing his "oral secretions", a.k.a. drool, much better. We are seeing so much purposeful movement - activating specially adapted toys, scooting around the house, and responding with delight to the people around him. Eamon continues to rest in a peace that seems "other-worldly".

Nursing care coverage has recently changed. Eamon still medically requires 16 hours per day, but we have been reduced to a daily 8 hour shift. This situation poses a great challenge. We are scheduled for minimal night coverage, leaving me as the "nurse-in-charge". I am feeling the effects of sleep deprivation, but believing that increase is coming - soon! Several promising scenarios have surfaced, please pray.

My friend, Super-Nurse-Maria, and I were chatting several weeks ago. She was sharing about a cancer diagnosis her husband was given 6 years ago (he is well today!). She recalled the alarming phone call announcing that life as they knew it was about to change, clearly remembering a sense of calm mixed with excitement that arose in her spirit. She explained that we all are in a "waiting room" of sorts. Life progressing, aware of God - possibly, but not yet face-to-face with Him. Until...whatever circumstance calls you in, no longer waiting for an encounter, but fully present with the One who ultimately orchestrates it all. An intimacy born of trial, depth of knowledge the reward.

The apostle Paul pleaded three times with the Lord to remove the "thorn" in his flesh. Instead of removing the difficulty, God promised a grace that is sufficient and power made perfect in weakness. I have asked God to remove our "thorns", but they persist for reasons I trust to God. Paul even goes on to "...boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." and to "delight in hardships and difficulties, for when I am weak, then I am strong."

Feeling weak, but knowing that is the beginning of strength. My soul boasting in the Lord!